本帖最后由 finder 于 2014-12-28 00:10 编辑 / o4 F3 j: Q1 z6 r7 l
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1. 尤其在商业上,报章杂志或公文书信上,尽量不用难字 (big word) 或过时的字眼 (old-fashioned word): l$ t4 s7 H9 D( d
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Many people feel that moral education is the infrastructure of higher learning. (许多人认为道德教育是高等知识的基础) (如果用 foundation 或 basis 代替 infrastructure 就更明白) / Z" }, C0 `; M. h% }, X9 w1 Y5 I, C+ J5 ~4 S" e( S" S: k& o
Three hundred acres of land is the parameter of our university,s expansion (growth). (三百英亩的土地是本大学发展的限度) (如果用limit代替parameter,会更简单易懂。)9 T) \# W3 \. M
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This news has been disseminated all over the U.S. (这消息已散布到全美各地) (如果用spread取代disseminated,不更简单?) (动词时态是:spread, spread, spread) 1 | A) `/ r! @7 |. j+ e. o 5 W0 ~3 d! l9 s* ] C2 V+ a8 E1 PThe president of this college is not diminutive in size. (这大学的校长个子不小) (假如用small代替diminutive,不更明白吗?)( {* n8 `0 f! ]1 j, B* V. l
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I have to elucidate this document to my staff. (我要向我的员工解释这份文件) (如用explain代替elucidate,也许更明白。) , e0 s% n9 m1 J8 H* K- S. V/ o' u7 W2 q8 [0 i6 Y6 N! U
Mr. A will endeavor to be a physician. (A 先生想尝试当个医生) (如果用try代替endeavor,会更浅白。) (endeavour = endeavor) * K( \3 A# Q. h2 c7 f/ L 4 _1 R# \& k' ^8 N& i9 B& L# ~We hope to visualize world peace in the future. (我们希望将来看到世界和平)(如果用see代替visualize,也许更简单!) ( `( @2 \' M9 Q! [ / W) J! f7 K6 h4 }! y7 lThe charitable organization solicits for our annual donation. (慈善机构要求我们一年一度乐捐)(假如用 ask 代替 solicit,更浅白易懂。)(solicitation是名词) / ~) T& i" @9 v4 g1 o$ r. t0 @! K4 p
We don't know what may transpire when we have a new boss. (当新老板来后,我们不知会有什么发生。) (如果用happen代替transpire,也许更明白。) 1 D# G9 |& E; J0 K2 W- i; }& M1 y7 {( F
Please act as soon as possible on the aforementioned matter. (前面提过的事,请尽速办理。)(如果用 previous 代替古字 aforementioned 不是更明白?). q6 S* l8 ?* {* J* P
* h' O7 {9 n$ Y6 Z2 a这就像美国大文豪马克吐温 Mark Twain 也曾说过:「我不愿在字典里找长字或难字,我绝不用『metropolis』这个字,因为我同样可以用『city』这个字来代替」。罗斯福总统为了强调美国政府不会遗忘那些穷人,在一篇讲词里用了这么一句:「We are endeavoring to construct a more inclusive society.」后来被人批评咬文嚼字,卖弄文笔。如果用浅白易懂的字眼写成:「We are going to make this country in which no one is left out.」或「We are trying to make everyone equal.」也许更简单明白!- n5 O) C; a/ u% M
- w, J# U- O8 {! U9 {; s 1 H1 n" y$ q I, r1 r2. 老外也主张不写噜苏或绚丽的字眼(flowery or wordy),句子应该越短越好,一句能用两个字,绝不多加一个。4 x( L# f. C& x. t5 r% W2 F
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At this point in time, we should pull together for our goal. (现在我们应该为我们的目标团结一致)(如果说:Now, we should pull......更简单。因为 at this point in time = now) ; J2 k& w, o8 d% r) V+ H & J! m- g R- U% v+ c9 VDespite the fact that my English is not very good, I am not discouraged. (虽然我的英语不好,但我不灰心。) (如果说:Although my English is not...... 就更简短。因为despite the fact tha t= although = Though). }( a( Z% A2 ^# {! ~* \9 Z
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I am of the opinion that Mr. Lee should resign from this position. (我想李先生应该辞职) (假如说:I think Mr. Lee should......不是更简单吗?因为I am of the opinion = I think)$ a- Z; Y( a* e" l3 v8 Q
Y" V1 }- v4 a4 J# ?0 P: s) LHe quitted the job due to the fact that he was sick. (他由于生病而辞职) (若说:He quitted the job because he was sick. 更简单。因为 due to the fact that = because) - y" H+ S5 }8 e/ j/ u- B+ {4 _& H 7 b! z5 v0 c/ t }0 [3 AIn the majority of cases,he likes to ride bike to the office.(他通常喜欢骑单车到办公室) (如果说:Usually, he likes to ride...... 更简单。因为 in the majority of cases = usually)5 A8 ], y% o1 T. |
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She shows a preference for tea rather than coffee. (她喜欢茶而不是咖啡) (若说:She prefers tea rather......更简短清楚,因为 show a preference for = prefer)- T2 u C/ ^9 t' @1 @# u, D1 A
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I will bring the matter to the attention of Mr. Wang. (我要通知王先生) + t# R [& N" \$ B$ c5 {5 }1 {8 t4 H3 ^* h' g* Z6 \1 n1 M/ L
如果只说:I will tell Mr. Wang (about the matter). 不是更简单吗?因为 bring the matter to the attention of = tell = inform) (句子最后面:「about the matter」可以省去); 同理,也要避免意义的重复或用字的多余 (redundant); 例如: ( B# h9 C v9 u% C/ P& ?2 ?5 k . |) _ u% T% H9 C" ? UThe consensus(of opinion)is that we have to act right away.(大家认为我们必须立即行动)(of opinion 可以省去,因为 consensus 的意思,就是大家的意见。)3 y8 p6 Y- v) }! ~0 B/ K
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The letter shows that the problem(continues to)remain unsolved.(他的信显示问题尚未解决)(continue to 是多余的字,因为 remain 已经有 continue 的含意。所以句子就成为:The letter shows that the problem remains unsolved.)0 F) k3 t, x# P+ U) ^2 b
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He has made his (final) conclusion in his speech.(他在演说里做出结论) (final 是多余的字,因为 conclusion 已经含有 final 的意思。) : E. r, r: t) k) Y* C5 O- O9 k4 P h% g+ \% Y
He has had many years of (actual) experience in business。(他有多年经商的经验) (actual 也是多余的字,因为 experience 已有 actual 的意味)! E/ a7 J- x$ ^, \3 Y# z
$ L; x& q d J# E8 ?We assembled (together) all the parts for our radio.(我们装好收音机的零件)(因为 assemble 本身就有 together 的意思,所以 together 是多余的) 6 k% _2 h+ i9 r( s5 g1 y+ `( I2 h1 w: D
Enclosed (herewith ) please find the report of the meeting.(herewith 是多余的字,因为 enclosed 就有 herewith 的意思)(即:附上会议报告,请查收)7 w9 V& k4 J2 s; m$ g- y( H x
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写到这里,想起一位深受美国人民爱戴,一向主张不写长句、不噜苏的美国已故参议员 Stephen Young,他每次受邀参加会议、演讲、宴会时,他的回信只有三个字「我会到」(I'll be there)......。也有人打趣的说:「讲演或写作的句子,就像穿迷你裙,愈短愈好。」(Like wearing mini-skirt, sentences in speech or writing should be the shorter, the better.)# i( w1 Z8 n8 S& a9 H. F
* t9 K$ q. ^5 j0 C* c此外还有:in reference to = about;draw to close = end; at an early date = soon等。2 y! I& t+ {' U0 z; s8 z ~
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1 h/ M1 o6 J) C! e 3.老外为了族群和谐相处,除不用歧视或偏见的字眼外,连男女性别,也要避免区别,以示「平等」。/ d1 t7 O0 F/ |$ o
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2 p7 s+ Q" `; I9 U3 n$ S1 Q' VMankind are considered the smartest animals in the world。(人类是世上最聪明的动物)= Man is the smartest animal......。 (如果改为:Human beings are considered the smartest animals...... 就能包括男女。所以 mankind = man = human beings) (注意:mankind 后面动词要用多数,而 man 的后面动词,则用单数)% f8 s7 r7 ]. A5 @
; {; H0 l- @4 b. ]$ i* n- pManpower seems not strong enough in developing our economy here. (发展这里的经济,似乎缺乏人力资源。)(如果说:Labor power seems not strong enough... 也就没有「男性主义」的感觉。可见 manpower = labor power = work force = human resources) 8 {+ \0 Y, J$ T/ }$ a/ v # ~0 t9 U# ^, bThis small company hired a cleaning woman yesterday.(这个小公司昨天请来一名清洁女工)(如果说:This small company hired an office cleaner...也就没有男女之分了) 6 p/ u! w2 f: {: ~- D- b5 b% O) u5 I
He (she) has been a committee chairman (chairwoman) since 1998. (自从1998年他就是委员会主席) (假如把chairman或chairwoman改为chairperson或chair,就没有男女之分。) (如指讨论会的主持人,也可称为 moderator 或 coordinator。)' o" F( u. O" O, {6 R
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Many businessmen (businesswomen) feel their jobs are very stressful.(许多商人觉得工作压力很大)(如果把 businessmen (businesswomen) 改为 business people 或 business executives 或 business managers 就可包括男女了)(凡是单数 man 或 woman,其多数都是 men 或 women。) # h8 t2 l- |/ Q. o J& s5 M' \: L' M# V! v' H3 R
Policemen (policewomen) should treat citizens with courtesy.(警察对人民应该有礼貌)(假如把 policemen 或 policewomen 改为 police officers 就可避免男女性别) * m3 `- ? U/ N \. M0 E$ s) u, [: m2 v) |- ]& mCongressmen (congresswomen) should speak up for their constitutes. (国会议员应该为其选民说话)(constitute = voter) (我们也可以把 congressmen 或 congresswomen 改为 members of congress 或 congressional representatives)1 T4 W* D7 [5 [- z0 e
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Stewardesses for international regions may get jet lag sometimes.(国际航线的空中小姐有时会有时差疲惫的现象)(如把 stewardess 改为 flight attendant,就能包括男女空中服务员。) 2 V; ^& ~$ |- @- i4 N& ? 7 b. w% T2 t( L$ r( c' D同理,我们可以把 salesman 或 saleswoman 改为 salesperson;把 mailman 改为 mail carrier 或 postal worker;把 foreman 改为 supervisor 等等。* h6 I: q, r# l! a( A